Sound of Melodies

Coffee this morning

2010-03-02T12:47:00.000-08:00

I have no creative way to title this blog entry. Honestly, I think I shut down when I come home from school. I get to relax, I get to be comfortable, I get to chill when I'm home. I don't think or write half as much.
I had coffee with an amazing lady this morning. She has been a mentor to me for a year or two now. She makes me think. She challenges me. . . and we get excited together about connecting theology, reality, creativity and humanity together.

This morning we got to talk about the evangelical church, the holistic theology movement and a type of evangelism that connects stories together. Ok, sorry, let me unpack that.

My mentor recently was in seminary. I don't know how we got to this topic but we starting talking about the "evangelical christian/church" and how the main focus is on "saving souls". some times the part of humanity or environmental issues gets pushed aside. How can we push aside the issue of holistic ministry to chop it up and PICK the part that saves souls? Jesus healed, God created the earth. And I am not trying diminish the value of where our souls are in relation to God. . . but how can we ignore the other. My mentor was saying that it is rooted in evangelical theology that there is going to be a "new heaven" , new earth" and "new bodies" therefore the soul is the main focus. . . .

So, is there a term for christians in america that want the focus to be on holistic ministry?

One more note, we talked a little on evangelism as knowing and understanding some ones story so to connect it or be able to relate it to Gods story. . . this is beautiful. unpack that thought.
see that in order for people to see God as a creator and lover and redeemer they have to relate their story to Gods. . .
compare this to the "track" evangelism or a 3 step manual of being saved. . . (that i grew up with. . . this is why I thought this was so cool).

ok, sorry these thoughts are so chopping and the writing is awful. . .
but I promised katherine I would blog!
I'm thinking on spring break! . . . and lovin it!
peace

Hallelujah

2010-02-23T09:46:00.000-08:00

I swear I'm going to blog about this song in depth sometime.
but for now, just look it up.
Hallelujah by Kate Voegele

What Is ___?

2010-02-21T21:02:00.001-08:00

I feel like a two year old.
I have these questions like,

What is love?
What does Hosanna really mean?
What is grace?
Why can't I define Holy?

I know there are dictionary definitions to my questions. . .
but I want to know these things.

I want to know experience.
I want to feel the odd kind of relationship between love and grace and brokenness and sin.

I lost the rest of my thoughts. . .
so goodnight

an abundance of contradictory emotions

2010-02-20T18:50:00.000-08:00

I want to cry. I want to break down. I want to be held by my God. I want to be whole.
I have at least two sided emotions where I feel one way and then the other.
Almost simultaneously.

What does this say about me?

God, I want to be focused. I want to be wholly human through emotions, thought and spirit.
and yet there are these emotions that pull me. . .

We have been talking about the doctrine of sin in my theology class. It is so unexplainable what Wholeness looks like. All we know is sin. . . and a sin impacted world. Did the world have this confusion of thoughts and emotions before sin came into humanity?

Its frustrating.
And confusing. . .
Abba, Hold me Daddy.
I want to be whole through you.

He Loves Me!

2010-02-15T06:42:00.000-08:00

I don't know quite how to explain this . . .
but,
I was at worship last night. It was such a good time.
We sang your love is extravagant.
It talks about how God considers us friends. . .
I compare myself in relationships to others
wondering why people would want to be friends with me.
I am not self confident
but I don't often wonder why Jesus pays me a second glance.

Why is that?

Honestly,
I don't think I was letting Jesus love me.
I didn't feel like I was enough. . or just didn't really recognize the imago dei within me that He so values and sees as precious.
Well,

Now i'm letting Him.
Jesus loves me.
I feel renewed.

On Relationships

2010-02-13T21:03:00.000-08:00

Ok, so connecting to my previous post, I had a thought.

A friend and I were talking today about the nature of relationships (friends, acquaintance, dates, etc.)
We were discussing our tendency of bringing our human gifts and support into the relationships instead of bringing transparency and a willing spirit and a desire to see God work in and through the relationship.

I think lately I have taken a lot of my relationships to heart. . . almost like a burden and not as a joy. I know it sounds awful, and that's not my intent. I'll try to explain further.

I think I've been taking too much of the responsibility of relationships onto my shoulders instead of allowing that to be inspired my God.
Does that make more sense?
It's just a journey of giving it up to him.

I'm still thinking. I'll let you know.
Goodnight.

Snow Feeling

2010-02-13T20:30:00.001-08:00

I went walking in the snow the other night. It was beautiful, it was mysterious, it was surreal. It was peaceful. I felt all those things.
Beauty. Peace. Mystery.

. . . and yet, I also felt that there was something deep in my heart that I wasn't surrendering to.

I still feel like this.
I have kept my self pretty busy since said snow walk, so I haven't had a time to get into my thoughts. . .

Honestly, I have mixed feelings when looking deep at my life/feelings/dreams. I get disappointed that the person I am is not the person I thought was becoming. . . and then I get excited about what is takin place there.. .

I don't know. I guess this post is just the precursor to my thoughts and ponderings. . .
I'll leave it at that.

Understanding

2010-02-11T23:12:00.000-08:00

I was with a friend tonight. We were just talking about life and passions and dreams. I can't really understand their mind. He answered a few questions just about how he thought. . . and then asked me why I wanted to know these things...

I want to understand.

I want to get life.

I don't want to miss anything....

I think lately I've felt that I am skimming the surface on life and issues and opportunities that I want to wrestle with and experience.

I caught up with another friend last night. She said that she is tired of being so caught up in the everyday task of school, work, homework, family etc. It's hard to dream big then and see beyond the next 24 hours.
But, is this really living? Day to day? task to task?

I want to transcend what is task and see what is purpose.

I want understanding.

a question on being real

2010-02-07T16:30:00.000-08:00

Hi All,

So, I had this thought today. I struggle with this quite often actually.

I want to be authentic in everything I do in life. However, when I actually embrace that I am having a bad day or I let a situation effect my personality I feel guilty. There are so many people that are dealing with more harsh conditions. Why should I have a bad day because I woke up late or because I didn't do as expected on a quiz....?

Do I have a right to embrace authenticity when transparency leaves me feeling upset over small issues in life?

Life is wonderful

2010-02-03T07:21:00.000-08:00

Thoughts later but this has been on repeat on my computer...

It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a storie
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying

It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes some words to make an action
And it takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction

Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la

It takes a night to make it done
And it takes a day to make you young brother
And it takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other

And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
And it takes some fears to make you trust
It takes those tears to make it rust
It takes the dust to have it polished

Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la

It takes some silence to make sound
And it takes a lost before you found it
And it takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to show you care
It takes a hole to see a mountain

Ah la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la la life is full of
Ah la la la la la life is so full of love
Ah la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la life is full of
Ah la la la la la life is so full of love

I saw

2010-02-02T21:46:00.000-08:00

I get frustrated with myself alot. I know most people probably do. I not only get frustrated at myself but then I get annoyed at that taking over all my thoughts.
But the most recent self absorbed thought was this:
I am not a quite person. I know this. But I have recently got annoyed at myself for not talking sometimes. I will talk at all the easy times and then when it is time to engage a person, issue, event, etc. I decide that my ideas, opinions aren't worth mentioning.
Do I really struggle with this much of a lack of confidence?

I have the song I saw by Matt Nathanson in my head.
The chorus keeps going through my head...

And I saw
Pictures in my head
And I swear I saw you opening up, again
Cuz I would be heavenly
if baby you'd just rescue me, now

I have substituted the last line. Baby if you'd come to me now. . .

I think God looks at me every day and has these thoughts. I feel like I get right to the edge of surrender or opening up completely and then I turn. . . and do what?

I don't know.
I really had sat down to write this blog on a totally different topic...guess that'll have to wait.

Love or the Idea

2010-01-26T22:16:00.000-08:00

I hate that I even have to ask this question.
Are we in love with something, someone, some cause...
Or are we in love with the idea of being in love?

This can relate to anything. It can't be limited to love.

Is our generation sold out for ending poverty one human at a time?
Or do we like the idea of doing something?

Is the second wrong?
Obviously the first would be preferred...

Just saying...
Just asking....

are we an idea driven generation...
or are we willing to put our hearts on the line for a project, emotion, people group?

All the same~ sick puppies

2010-01-24T22:45:00.000-08:00

I dont mind where you come from
As long as you come to me
But I dont like illusions I cant see
Them clearly
I dont care, no I wouldn't dare
To fix the twist in you
You've shown me eventually what you'll do
I dont mind
I dont care
As long as you're here

[Chorus]

Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
And do it all over again
It's all the same

Hours slide and days go by
Till you decide to come
But in-between it always seems too long
Suddenly
But I have the skill, yeah
I have the will, to breath you in while I can
However long you stay is all that I am

I dont mind, I dont care
As long as you're here

Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
And do it all over again
It's always the same

Wrong or Right
Black or White
If I close my eyes
Its all the same

In my life
The compromise
I'll close my eyes
Its all the same

Go ahead say it
You're leaving
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are now
If you take me for everything
Do it all over again
It's all the same

Miracles...of the little sort

2010-01-21T17:14:00.000-08:00

I've been struggling some lately. I have felt God calling me out of one ministry...and into...He only knows. It has been really hard. I love that ministry and have a heart for the people, who have been more like family. I love the heart of the ministry....
But I had a feeling that God was calling me out of this. I am not a quitter. And it was so hard to leave half way through the year...
It broke me in a lot of ways. And it hurt the people that I was working with...
A friend of mine was recently in this same situation of being called from where he was.
He was saying that sometimes people get hurt through not understanding the work of God....
I don't know if I like that...but it makes sense.
Ah, I've even been stupid and selfish enough to get jealous and hurt over a friend moving away...to do missions work...how insane is that?!

But, I was at peace that I would take the step to follow whatever God had in mind for this semester...
I was broken about leaving the group...

I was sitting in my room talking to my roommate when we got a knock on the door...

I had heard this girl perform spoken word last semester and it was really touching...such a blessing
so i wrote her a note and found her dorm and slipped in under her door.

she was the knock at the door...
she had been looking for me.
she came to say thank you.
and said to keep life open. and shining for God
and just to follow Him through every action of life...
to trust and live.
it was such a peace.

she prayed over me.
such an encouragement.

The God of the universe continues to surprise me...
and I don't know why I continue to think of Him on Human terms...

I'm smiling ...
true joy.

Sin and Redemption

2010-01-20T04:07:00.000-08:00

I was reading for my theology class this morning. Lutheranism actually. It's very interesting, not that it's so far beyond what I know in the Protestant faith. Just whenever you get down to the foundational ideas of anything I think you realize new things.

The Lutheran faith believes that humans are seen as both sinners and completely redeemed. Is that possible?
But then, isn't that what we are?

God saved us, yes, without a doubt. we are redeemed.
But I am a sinner. By nature, by actions.

I am just a little confused at the statement. I am a sinner and yet redeemed. Do they contradict themselves?
Is that the nature of God at work?

Eye Catching

2010-01-19T19:09:00.001-08:00

Look at her. She is breath taking. I saw this picture on The Independent website. Her name is Wideline. Her parents were killed in the earthquake in Haiti. My heart breaks for this 9 year old girl.
Please pray for Wideline. Her future. Healing. A Home. Role Models.

....Haiti, our hearts break with yours.

...Tonight...

2010-01-17T19:56:00.000-08:00

I spent time being broken with God tonight...still am.

Have so many ideas, cries and thoughts. Won't be able to write them all

but i think there is something about always having something to ponder...

I feel so inadequate, I think that's because I am. and yet I think sometimes I must underestimate myself..as a daughter of God. There are greater things to do...and I sit here..in my humanity.

I feel disconnected, I feel helpless, i feel like i should be doing something.

I was wondering the other day. Does God ever feel helpless....in His sovereignty?

more later...

2010-01-17T11:03:00.000-08:00

I went running yesterday. It was cold, but warmer than its been all week, so I thought i would take the opportunity to wear shorts...People from NC would I think was crazy in shorts running in the cold....but I needed it.

I ran a little around wayne and walked when I got really deep in thought....

Here were my thoughts.

are some people better lovers?
is the attraction between ppl the character of God in them? amigo dei? and then the mess or conflict in those relationships the sin or humanity within the persons?
are the people that can look over the humanity in people and make relationships work through the mess better lovers?

a lovers rain will wash away the envy and the fear~ josh radin

I was listening to Hallelujah by Kate Voegele a lot lately.
hallelujah...a lovers cry for what? to be alive? do we sing hallelujah in life...in just broken, complecated, mixed tones?
love is not a victory march...its a cold and broken hallelujah.

do we exclaim that theres a God above in every breath we take.
when we are living in our humanity. does is show that we know there has to be something greater than the mess we’ve created?

This is the mess within my head...and when I let it, on my heart.
Good day.

Mess,

2010-01-16T09:38:00.000-08:00

I feel like a lot of things are in a mess right now.

I guess that's what happens when lives come together, stories overlap and humanity is involved.

Sometimes I wonder about the thing that we've made life out to be. Why is it that in life we look for success and relationships? Why is it that we are driven to impress others? Why is it that equality is not one of the first thoughts in our mind when it comes to humanity?

I think these are just random thoughts that come when I try to get an answer or solution to all thats going on in my immediate circle of friends.

Why do we need things that we might not want? Why we want things that we may not need?
Is the only solution to that Humanity?
Is it the essence of spirituality? The struggle or journey of finding what is sustaining?

I'm sorry most of this blog is questions, but this is the way I think.

right now I'm feeling the broken piece......not so beautiful...

Cut and Paste Generation

2010-01-12T09:00:00.001-08:00

First week of classes at EASTERN! so far all my classes have been fantastic! ....I am about to go to business statistics..i'll let you know how that goes.
anyways, my international relations professor was talking and touched on the fact that my generation is known as the cut and paste generation....
that hurt.
he expanded.
our generation is known for transferring information, not engaging. we know how to present and access but do not take time to connect to it.....

broken...

2009-10-28T18:43:00.000-07:00

I dont know why i'm writing because i really dont know what to say... i'm so broken right now....
i just watched hotel rwanda and every face of pain and terror all i could think about is the kids, women and men that i played with, served with and stood along side while i was in Kenya. why do we see africa as such a far away land? they are our brothers and sisters...why didn't we help...? why else is going on that we turn our back to or simply choose not to see?

Heaven and Hell....

2009-10-28T13:35:00.000-07:00

This all comes from the book A New Kind of Christian by Brian McLaren. If you have not read this book I strongly encourage you to do so.

BUT, anyways, in chapter 10 the two main characters of the book are discussing heaven and hell. One character is talking from a postmodern viewpoint says that maybe Heaven and Hell are not two different locations. They quite possibly are mindsets and were talked about as places so that we could better understand the concepts.

The character says that he believes that the God he knows loves the human race too much to believe that God would send the "unsaved" to Hell. Therefore he proposes that everyone goes to one place after this life (He doesn't talk on how they get there so I wont guess on that). However, the Heaven and Hell concept come in here. If a person has used their life on earth to experience God and been open to loving and pursuing Gods mercy and justice and goodness then this place will be "Heaven" to them. They will be able to experience God in such a capacity and see love and goodness all the time. On the other hand the people who have spent their life against God and fighting love and goodness will be tormented throughout eternity even though God will be present. Because they will be opposed to the holiness of God it will be "Hell" for them to be present...

Thoughts?
please don't only take my view for this idea. Please read A new kind of christian.
But I really do want to hear your thoughts.

This concept makes a lot of sense to me. We always say that God is omnipresent...and yet we think that Hell is a place where He is vacant? I dont know.

ok, that's all that I can say on the topic. I apologize if this is confusing. i, myself am still exploring these ideas....

why aren't we in jail?

2009-10-28T13:23:00.000-07:00

OK! another thought. I've kinda been holding on to this one since sunday....its not fully developed, but here goes.

Ok, sunday night some friends and i were talking. we were going through galatians chapter 2. the passage galatians 2:5 caught our attention. Paul and others refused to follow the (Jewish) tradition or law so that they would be able to truly live.
One of my amazing friends shared that once he was talking to Shane Claiborne and heard alot of the stories where Shane was actually put in jail several times....for helping homeless and others.

Do we have "american" or "christian" unspoken laws or traditions that it is time for us to lay down? Why aren't we in jail for breaking those cultural boundaries? ....

underwelmed, welmed or overwelmed....

2009-10-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

I was talking to a friend today walking to church this morning. We were discussing the fact that we feel like there are almost too many amazing experiences and ways to encounter God lately. my friend was talking about how she feels like God is teaching her new things about life and developing her as a person through every experience, however, she doesn't feel like she is able to take time and apply that to her life before another experience takes first priority. Our greatest fears that we were talking about is to have a lot of stories to tell but not be changed by those experiences.

thoughts? do you think that you can be overwelmed by experiences without lifechange? how do you change this? does it take slowing down to focus on the lessons? or do we just leave the application to God and simply open ourselves to what He is/will shaping our lives to be?

sorry for the jumbled life.
this is what coffee at night will get ya
k.
love y'all
chels

... conflict... reliance..

2009-10-24T07:35:00.000-07:00

Well, this week is the first time I have experienced any kind of conflict at college. It's nothing really big, just some tense situations between a few people on campus. It's amazing how much I feel stretched in these situations. And I don't have a profound thought to follow this. Last night when everything was on my mind and I was trying to figure out how I was going to handle these situations I was talking to a friend. She didn't ask what was going on, even stopped me when I tried to include her (she knew I had already vented on the subject...) She simply asked "Have you prayed about it...?" She quickly followed by saying she wasn't judging or even offering advice. Just asking a question...
Honestly, I hadn't. The whole thing wasn't a huge deal, but it was enough to take up some of my thoughts for part of the night... Why do I look to people whom I trust for God to speak through them before I sit a while and spend time being quiet in Him? How much less worrying would I do? I'm not sure....
I'll have to try it...
anyways. hope y'all are having a great weekend!
love y'all!
Chels

Acting I class ...lived in real life...

2009-10-21T22:30:00.000-07:00

We are going over actions in Acting 1 class and have been going over them for the past couple of weeks. Honestly, I love doing this. We do exercises where we get partners and pull out an action from a list that we have developed and played with and then have about a 30 second period of time where we are to "do" the action to our partner. Here are the interesting parts. 1) you have to do you action without words of any kind and 2) your partner must begin and try to regain a "neutral" state of being while at the same time allowing his or her emotions/thoughts to respond to your action.
Ok, while that might have been hard to follow, the result is beautiful. The partners job of simply being neutral is amazing. Hallen (my acting prof) walked us through the physical state of being neutral. Shoulders back/relaxed, breathing normal, standing with your weight shifted forward (ready to embrace whatever is about to come your way)...this results in amazing feelings and thoughts to respond to your partners actions....
so, the other day (between all my other thoughts) I got to thinking...How different would life be if we were not on guard? How much more would we love, experience, rejoice over if we were in a state of "neutral" living? If our heart was open, heads were waiting to respond, arms were extended to all that life had to give. That doesn't mean to be run over, or believe whatever others push on you....just to be able to experience things at a new, pure, authentic level...what would that look like?
There are too many things in the world that I think that I have to guard against....or just do not think it is worth the effort to open myself up. It is way easier to live life in a "shell" like position...at least i think.
Ok, those were just some of my thoughts....sorry for the mess of words and "..."
:)
love y'all,
chels

BEAUTY IN THE BROKEN. Fill me up, pour me out

2009-10-12T06:25:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I know I haven't posted in a really long time. But now it just seems right to start writing again. I can't even explain everything that is going on in my heart and my head right now. In my faith, reason and justice class last week a guest speaker came in and talked about post-modernism. I can't really explain it hear through the keyboard because I'm still exploring it in my heart but I felt set free to just be in love with Jesus. The speaker was talking about how postmodernity was seeking authenticity, the incomparable truth, acknowledging that we are mere human and can't even start to understand....we are just called into this amazing love story, just to sit and wonder and act ...in the presence of an AWESOME GOD!

So, that's going through my head....

I mean, I've been thinking alot of starting back blogging....but last night really was the turning point. This was a story that I had to write about.

Some friends and I on campus have started a little bible study on sunday nights. Its not really organized. Just whoever shows up at 9pm in the chapel are welcome. We share whats on our hearts, prayer request, testimonies and read through a couple verses...Last night we read Galatians 1.

"Obviously, I'm not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ's servant." Gal 1:10

(ok, I know there is so much more in this chapter than this...but this verse stuck out in bible study and was kinda the theme for the night)

We prayed and everyone from bible study went to worship (campus wide sunday nights 10pm worship...amazing time) I sat outside some and talked to Abby (sister). I got off the phone and I had tears running down my face. I miss her so much....and yet God is showing me how beautiful it is to be broken and how wonderful it is to be desiring. How I dont have a clue what is going on in life..but He is weaving this amazing story together. One of my girlfriends left worship early and saw me...she came over...we both started crying. there is something about bringing two girls together...

She is in the same place I was spiritually that I was this Spring...KNOWING God with your head, but WANTING to FEEL Him in your heart SO badly! She was crying. She was broken. And that's so beautiful. We dont have to have everything figured out. She has an amazing desire. How glorious is that picture? How often do we get to be or allow ourselves to be broken before God?

We talked, prayed, and held each other for a while...I walked out with a good friend. She was struggling with her family and transitions and things that were happening there. Just the real-ness and the authenticity in her emotions and in her heart...that we can be that OPEN before God.

Another friend texted me when I got back to my dorm. We talked about relationships. How badly we wanted to do what was right. The confusion and commitment that comes with friendships. We talked about the desire to be known. ...

I know that this was an awful attempt at a blog. but i'm out of practice...

Last night was just a huge blessing...

For now, and where I'd always like to be

...beautiful in the broken...

Before Him,

chelsea

Ode to Senior Year

2009-05-01T18:21:00.001-07:00

I really didn't know what to expect going into to my Senior year of high school. I've heard it said that its the best year of your life...and that you're pulling your hair out ready to get out! Senior year has been amazing. No matter how many times I say I'm ready to go to college I have ten time the thoughts hit me of how blessed I am and how much I will look back and miss these days.
I am really excited about going to Eastern University this coming fall. I just got a letter in the mail. I have to be on campus August 19!! coming up fast!!
Anyways, I'm so excited about eastern, but lately i've been, oh my word, its coming up fast. God has just blessed this time. I am really able to see just how much my family and friends mean to me. I find myself living a little crazy (not so scheduled) to spend those few extra minutes with them!
so, just a conclusion. Senior year has been great! I graduate in 2 weeks. I can't really say that I regret or missed out doing anything....
I just hope this wasn't the best year of my life...I hope/dream God has so many amazin things to come!!

Love always!
Chels

Pictures...

2009-04-17T22:01:00.000-07:00

HEY GUYS!!! So, I had some senior pics taken this semester! Thought I would share...Sorry about the spazy spacing!

Love you guys!!!

Chels

senioritus

2009-04-15T13:59:00.001-07:00

Ok, I really didn't think it was going to be this bad. I kinda just saw senioritus as another label for the ''cool kids'' to claim...um, not true. its a medical disease..and I have it! It's pretty awful. I mean, I CANT WAIT to get to Eastern..I'm just saying. Its hard to concentrate and live my last semester in highschool to the fullest...HELP!!

2009-04-11T20:27:00.000-07:00

I went to newspring church today. their easter service was such a Godthing. Perry spoke on heaven and hell/Jesus' amazing life/the lack in our lives...the statement that really struck me was how Perry worded the invitation to accept Jesus. He said Jesus did all this for you- He died for you, he DIED for YOU. He SAVED you...the least you can do is get up out of your seat and come to the front and show how serious you are about becoming a child of God.
I'm tired of ''pretty'' Christianity. I don't know how else to say this. I have struggled alot lately with this. I look at Jesus' life. I look at what He has done for me and through me and in my heart as i type. what am I NOT doing for Him that I could be? That's my train of thought.
Why am I in school? ~ Shouldn't I be in the streets on India serving the kids?
Why do I have a car? ~ Shouldn't I sell it and use the money to dig wells in Africa?
Why do I go out to eat with friends? ~ Could I use that money some other way?
I know that God works through the school and the car and community with friends (in restaurants or not...) I just have really been thinking alot about that lately.
He DIED for ME, HE SAVED ME...the least I can do is.....___ fill in the blank.
Please, any insight on this is soooo appreciated.
chels

all my hope is in you...

2009-04-10T20:34:00.000-07:00

I hung out with some of my girlfriends last night. we went to the chris tomlin concert in winston. let me just say it was awesome. chris tomlin had just stepped onto the stage. i think it was the second song - Jesus Messiah.

'All my hope is in you...' ..all my hope, all my dreams, all i look forward to and am passionate about. Jesus Messiah. I don't really have a point for this run on of thoughts other than it hit me. ALL MY HOPE. That's everything I enjoy, everything I cling to. It's all in my Savior. Am I consistant in crying ALL MY HOPE IS IN YOU JESUS?

Another thought. This line was in several songs, God just kept bringing this to my heart. "All praise/glory to YOU". Ok, I know y'all probably have this one down. For some reason I had not recognized how huge this statement was. I am thinking. from my little perspective, all the praise that I can give is yours. ALL MY glory I will give to YOU God. Ok, NO. ALL THE PRAISE-EVER. ALL THE GLORY-FOREVER goes to GOD! Everything we could ever give as a CREATION giving back to such a WONDERFUL CREATOR would NEVER be enough praise/glory to describe His Majesty. ...wow ALL THE PRAISE/GLORY TO YOU GOD! LIGHT OF THE WORLD!

ok, last. I went on a youth retreat with one of my really close friends a couple of years ago. He has always been a breath of fresh air and perspective to my walk with God. He told me one day after the retreat that the whole time we were in worship He was thinking how good God looks in pink. the lights on the stage were pointed toward the ceiling and tinted pink. This statement always left me confused/amazed. If you think about how approachable our God is yet mysterious and completely powerful and mighty...wow
Sittin here feeling like a little girl in the midst of my amazing Savior,
chels

There's only Grace...

2009-04-08T04:04:00.000-07:00

A quick thought for this morning. I was driving to work yesterday afternoon and the song came on the radio 'There is no guilt here, there is no shame, no pointing fingers there's no blame'..I've heard this song a million times. But for some reason yesterday my heart was listening. I feel like often I walk around 'free' as a Christian but still heavy with the burden that I might mess up. Maybe its just me, I just have seen how God can work through people and situations. I feel like i'm walking around in a half-pre-guilt that I might not give Him my all in every situation. The song says

'There's only grace, there's only Love, There's only Mercy and believe me, it's enough'

WOW. think, there is ONLY grace, love and mercy. There is no room for anything else. We are living in the light of our Savior. His plans, priorities, dreams and hopes for us are GRACE, HOPE, LOVE. It's completely freeing and thrilling to know that my God is waiting for me to get it right...to start living in the GRACE,HOPE,LOVE He's providing for me.

Ok, off to school now! =)
Have an amazing day!
GRACE, HOPE, LOVE,
Chels

I hate all your show...

2009-04-04T20:38:00.000-07:00

This song has just really been on my heart all day today. Jon Foreman wrote this...its such a powerful song.... look it up. listen to it. let it call you out...its a huge challenge for me to give up my junk, schedules and religion and just run and worship my God and give him the glory ...

with an abandoned heart,

chels

I hate all your show and pretense
The hypocrisy of your praise
The hypocrisy of your festivals
I hate all your show
Away with your noisy worship
Away with your noisy hymns
I stomp on my ears when you’re singing ‘em
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show

Your eyes are closed when you’re praying
You sing right along with the band
You shine up your shoes for services
There’s blood on your hands
You turned your back on the homeless
And the ones that don’t fit in your plan
Quit playing religion games
There’s blood on your hands

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show
I hate all your show

Let’s argue this out
If your sins are blood red
Let’s argue this out
You’ll be one of the clouds
Let’s argue this out
Quit fooling around
Give love to the ones who can’t love at all
Give hope to the ones who got no hope at all
Stand up for the ones who can’t stand at all, all
I hate all your show
I hate all your show
I hate all your show
I hate all your show

Instead let there be a flood of justice
An endless procession of righteous living, living
Instead let there be a flood of justice
Instead of a show
I hate all your show

with an abandoned heart...

2009-04-03T15:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, Today has been amazing. Completely amazing. This isn't because of events really. I mean, I woke up, did some last minute homework and went to class. I came home and went to lunch with mom. I hung out with my family and now I'm home. Just an ordinary day....but my God worked in it!! =) I feel like I'm on a high. I know people at ACC were looking at me funny for smiling so much and actin all bouncy!
Ok, in case you are reading from somewhere other than Mebane, NC today is absolutely beautiful. The sky is blue and the clouds are ...ok, i know i sound funny describing the clouds. So, I was smiling already driving to school. The Stand played on my CD.
"with arms high and heart abandoned...in awe of the one who made it all"
I really started thinking about what it means to abandon my heart...there are so many things that my heart is tied to. I even have schedules that I hold 'close to my heart' i could say. I have Kenya support and deadlines, I have Eastern University things to remember...I have so many people that are so dear to me. And I need to abandon my heart for my King. ...? Its still a mystery to me. But I tried today. I tried to hold all the things I love so much to my God and see how He blesses and reveals...
Ok, so, I got to school a little before class so I sat outside for a minute and flopped open my Bible to psalms. Psalm 11:15 showed up. "...granting me the joy of your presence..."!!
Wow!!
Those words are so far out of my reach, I can't help but running them through my head over and over and smiling.
My God graces me with His presence daily...
The next question for me is why can't I tune in?
I stopped by the church today ...(honestly I just needed a bathroom stop...yeah, it was a God thing).
I stopped by Cathy's Office. Ok, I LOVE HER! She is one of the people that can ask me how my semester is going and not stop this vibe (i don't know how to explain it) until I spill my guts about life, God, family, junk and anything on my heart.
We got to talking about how God is in every minute ..and how we compartmentalize and try to put Him in certain days or hours of the day. I want to be so tuned into God and His presence that I can break those compartments and schedules...so today can be every day. I don't want to miss one of one of those 'God moments' that He has planned to pursue me. Cathy and I talked about how schedules and deadlines and competition and religion compete with God (and joy,love,grace,mercy) for attention...
BUT!
If we are so in tuned to Gods presence then we can view schedules, deadlines, etc to be used as a tool to further HIS kingdom...and His glory! and His love! AMEN!!!!!!

with an abandoned heart,
chels

Creating a servant heart...

2009-04-03T15:05:00.000-07:00

Hey Guys!! I had to share this! A friend of mine in Africa wrote this yesterday...check out her blog....
With an abandoned heart,
chels

"I am learning if I make myself available I am actually creating space in my own life to be a part of someone else's answered prayer." ~ Corrie
http://johnandcorrieguckenbergerfamily.blogspot.com/2009/04/no-girl.html

Clouds and Majesty somewhere around 6 in the morning

2009-03-29T14:21:00.000-07:00

I was driving to work this morning..wait, let me preface this by saying that I wasn't the happiest little dwarf singing and hiking up the hill. I just had my wisdom teeth out Thursday, my mouth still is puffy and ..um..beautiful. It was just a Sunday that I would have rather slept 30 more minutes and then went to sunday school.
So, I don't even get off my front porch without realizing how amazing the clouds were this morning. I was driving all the way to work with my head bent down near the steering wheel looking up at the sky....now I realize that this isn't exactly the safest way to drive but God put those clouds in the sky this morning for me to see and be in awe of His glory. It was a huge reminder of WHO GOD IS. I get caught up in looking at people and seeing characteristics that come from God...its just people like characteristics are nothing compared to God like characteristics...you just had to look at the sky to see all the things God had written this morning....
WOW

Ungana...Kenya...We're Getting Close!!

2009-03-25T10:25:00.000-07:00

Hey All!! I am so excited to let you know that Graham and I are headed to Kenya with The Ungana Project this summer (June 25-July 4). I honestly cannot wait! We will be working with Ngaamba (a community that St. Marks has partnered with). Our time will be spent digging wells, playing with kids, working with the local church and loving on Gods people of Kenya!!
God has so much to teach me! I am incredibly excited about going to Kenya....but am having a hard time giving Him everything while I'm here in the states....in the area that I'm used to. I am struggling raising funds for Kenya because I have tried to take it into my own hands. Please pray for me....Graham and I need to raise $5,000. I am diving in now, giving it all to God. In ways it's completely freeing....and a little scary to control freaks like me. Its never been about me...that's not starting now, it's always been and to be about My Amazing God!!
I cannot even imagine what all God is doing in Kenya! It takes my breath away to think that He is going to use me in some little way to work His plan in Africa!!!
Thank you for all your prayers and support!
I love you guys!!

Chels

Jesus Loves You!

2009-03-11T20:14:00.000-07:00

I saw this on Ashley's blog and had to share it....just another story How God breaks through our ordinary days with His amazing love.....
Jesus Loves You!
chels

Ok, so I just wanted to give a quick little testimony as to what God spoke to me today, a few of you have already heard, but read it anyways because there’s something I want us to try to do..

Today, i was walking around to class with my Ipod in listening to this song that simply says “oh how he loves us” and as I walked into my religious studies class, I noticed that someone had written “Jesus Loves You” in big letters on the chalk board. Now ofcourse in this class, we talk about all religions, and Jesus is definitly not the focal point. I didn’t even know who had written it, and it was most likely written as a joke… So I sat down, still listening to those words in my Ipod, “Oh how He loves Us”, and then my professor walks in. Most of the class wasn’t paying attention, they were talking and focusing on other things, but I watched as my professor took the eraser and began to erase those three words that we’ve seen some many times… “Jesus Loves You”

In that moment I saw that no one was even looking or even cared, and God literally humbled my heart then and there in that classroom. He began to speak to me, and I felt completely broken before God… they didn’t get it! JESUS LOVES YOU, yet they all didn’t even seem to care. But then I noticed that as he erased those words, I could still see this chalked blur on the board, and even though it may have been smeered, I still knew what had been written there… and it was like God came down and sat right beside and began to say “no matter how much they try to ignore it, push it out of their minds, and say its not true, I’m always going to Love them, I’m always going to Love you. ” There’s not an eraser powerful enough in existence to erase the love He has for us.

God has really laid this on my heart now for a good while… there are a lot of us who are struggling with acceptance, confidence, motivation, myself included. Lately I’ve been tearing myself apart about what people think and how I come across to people. It’s been a battle that I’ve been losing and it’s taken me seeing several other people going through the same struggle to realize just how much satan is tearing God’s people down with these lies. I’m tired of seeing God’s children struggle, and I’m tired of trying to please this world. We try so hard to make people love us but we’re not looking at the board in front of us… Jesus Loves You. Oh how He loves us, why should you try to be someone you’re not to get people to love you when there is a God who loves you for exactly who you are?! Why should you let the pressures and opinions of others stop you from doing what God wants you to do?! Why? Because we’ve taken those three simple words for granted over the years. It’s time to put the eraser away. It’s time to step into a love that will cause us to transform in so many ways, and I promise you, I PROMISE YOU… you will never be the same!

So heres what Daniel Mallard came to me with, we want to see as many people as possible change their status to “Jesus Loves You”, to the point where its all over the place!

There are a lot of people out there who are searching for something, and you never know what God can speak to someone in just those three simple words. There are too many people who don’t feel like anybody loves them, but a simple status change can open their eyes to the God of unfailing Love.

So anytime after you read this, change your status, and if you want, change it continually throughout the day so it will show up on th eupdates and on peoples newsfeeds. If we all do it, it will be everywhere! It’d be great to keep it up throughout the week! God bless ya’ll

Jesus Loves You

John 3:16
Galatians 1:10

-Zach

Truth and Love....True Love and Love that's True...

2009-03-11T14:25:00.000-07:00

So, I've been thinking about these things since Sunday. I can't really make a clear distinction. I think that these subjects are too deep for my little human brain to wrap all the way around.

I heard someone say Sunday that they think about Truth they think about True Love....

...wow....

If you think about it, its logical for Truth to be an umbrella for Love. For Love to be ...well, Love, it has to be sincere, honest...it has to be endearing. It has to be True.
Another thought...
Love has to be True to be love...
but does Truth have to be love to be Truth?

Does that make sense? I don't know...
I've just been trying to dig into this love thing deeper....
God is love...I want to know God, then what is love?

Next Post won't be so scattered! I promise!!
In His LOVE!
night all,
chels

"इ कैन'टी स्टाप क्र्यिंग कौसे यू वों'टी स्टाप काल्लिंग माय नेम"

2009-03-05T19:52:00.001-08:00

ओके, सो माय कंप्यूटर इस दोंग थिस वेइर्द थिंग वेयर इट्स तकिंग माय वोर्ड्स एंड तुर्निंग थेम इन्तो हिन्दी ओंस इ टाइप थेम.....हम। इन्तेरेस्तिंग।

India Pictures =)

2009-03-01T19:33:00.000-08:00

I was looking through my India pictures today and realized that I didn't have any on my blog. So, here they are! Well, Some of them. This is me and Mumta (my translator ) that I blogged about earlier while I was in Kolkata. She is amazing and I miss her so much! The other picture is of Sean playing with the kids. We had just finished a game of Colbidy Colbidy Colbidy. Its an Indian game that the kids taught us. Its very complicated...and involves two teams pulling each other to different territories. but lots of fun!! ok, I promise more pictures to come later. My computer to uploading them super slow....
now I am going to enjoy a night of snow falling from the sky!!
God is awesome!
Love y'all!
Chels

Christians = Normal?

2009-03-01T19:24:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking lately- dangerous I know...but, are Christians supposed to be normal? I mean, are we really supposed to fit into the culture of today's world? Shouldn't people look at us and we're freaks? I want to love, live, give, worship, spend, adore, play, work, change in a way that only a Christ follower would. ....
maybe it's too revolutionary....so....sign me up.

Sitting, Waiting, Hoping, Praying

2009-03-01T19:08:00.001-08:00

This morning I was talking to a man who has truly blessed my life. He has incredible wisdom and is able to open my eyes to Gods ways in areas I have never even thought through.
I've been off a little bit lately. I don't know if I would describe it as struggling. For these last couple of weeks since India I have felt spiritually stuck. I know what I believe and my commitment and desire for God and spreading His message haven't changed. I still am in love with my Savior and have my quiet time...I just don't feel like I'm getting deeper. I want so badly to grow in my relationship with Jesus and know Him in a more intimate way every moment...that hasn't been happening lately.
I've tried reading more, thinking more...honestly, I've gotten really frustrated.
I was talking to my mentor today. He was talking about how everyone hits a ''spiritual ceiling". When you first become a Christian you hit ''walls'' all the time, but don't really know because you aren't as in tune with God and His message. Christian leaders and followers that have matured feel a burden when they hit the ''ceiling''.
This is exactly how I've felt. I felt guilty almost for not growing constantly deeper in love with my God.
Then my mentor brought out the fact that I overlooked in this situation.
"God does EVERYTHING in His own timing"
I know this to be true...just for some reason this time I thought it was on ME to fix it. I wasn't growing in MY relationship with God. So, it must be MY job to fix that.
Thank God, He Saves!!
God's going to grow me in His own time. I will be sitting, listening, waiting, hoping and praying....and worshiping my God...and HE will grow me.

A rainy day on March 1st

2009-03-01T11:16:00.000-08:00

I love days like this. I can't really explain why...I just do. It's like God knows exactly what we need. He knew on March 1, 2009 that planet earth needed rain. For reasons beyond our comprehension He saw this need. Either the ground was dry, people needed a day inside...I'm not sure.

I know that God is calling me to live in a different country. I have all these dreams of becoming a missionary...and then someday down the road hopefully a missionary mom. I'm so excited about what God will bring into my future. I am excited about going to College next year....but I read blogs and hear stories of families in the mission field right now.

I'm just imagining all the possibilities for missions that I would love to be apart of...
~Living in Africa and working with kids effected by aids
~Traveling across America to Inner cities working with women and their kids
~being homeless for a season sharing Gods love with others without shelter
~Settling in a foreign village town...going wherever God leads me....

Questions like
Would Jesus live in a house if He walked the earth today?
Would Jesus buy/drive a car?
What would His lifestyle look like?
Does He call all christians to follow His lifestyle?

I get really excited about just dreaming...I don't know where God will take me...but this is the adventure i'm living.

Thanks for reading my thoughts...
God is working hard on me in these last couple of days especially.

Hard enough for two dogs to get along....

2009-02-26T08:55:00.000-08:00

My Great-Grandfather had a saying "its hard enough for two dogs to get along, much less people".. does this apply to Christians too? I know that we as a group of messed up sinners coming together as the Body of Christ will obviously have a couple of disagreements...but it seems like lately there aren't alot of people on the same page...
I can't say that I feel like I am living a life of purpose and glory toward God right along side all the believers I know.
I know in my heart that we all believe, worship, love and adore the same God...why can't we put on a little bit more of a united front?
I read a quote the other day that hit me hard. Mother Teresa said "If you judge people you have no time to love them".
Is this the reason for little divisions between Christians? Have we gotten so used to the way things are divided (church by church/denomination by denomination) that we can't see the Body of Christ as a whole.....?

Back in the States!!!

2009-01-24T16:33:00.000-08:00

Hey Guys! I am back!!!! Our flight got into RDU at 11:30am today. Travel back home went really smooth. I am still in a daze. I feel like I'm sleep walking...give me a few hours of sleep and I'll be back on top of it! Pictures and stories to come!!
In HIM!
Chels

Last Days Over Seas....

2009-01-22T12:09:00.000-08:00

Hey Guys.....=)
We are flying out tomorrow morning to start our long journey home. There will be more than 20 hours of flying time put together. There are so many stories and thoughts that I will blog as soon as I get home. Right now I am just praising God for such an amazing CHURCH BODY that I have back in the states! Thank you guys for everything! I promise so many stories will be on the blog by this next week!
Love Always!
Chelsea

Hello From India!!

2009-01-16T06:37:00.000-08:00

Hey Guys!! Sorry....I'm failing at keeping you updated so far...
Everything is going so amazing here!! This past week we were able to hold a 4 day sports camp at 3 different village schools. All the brothers and sisters here are SO on fire for the cause! Its so encouraging....I feel like this is what the BODY is supposed to look like. During the camp we worked with 200ish kids ranging in age from 6ish-17ish. Grades here are NOT the same. You might have a 3rd grade class of a couple 8 year olds, 12 year olds and 16 year olds...it just depends. Our team was partnered with 3 amazing translators!! Everyone of them has been so awesome. I made friends fast with a girl that translated for us...I have learned in the last few days that her family (that is completely Hindu) is so against the work she is doing with us that they have beat her this week......after she told me that she said praise Him! .....I was taken back. Could I have faith that strong if I was in the same position...? He is at work here!! My team toured around downtown today....there is so much darkness here...and yet He is at work. The lights that are shining are so bright. I can't explain it. (ok, more stories later when I don't have to watch what I type....=)
Love you all!!!
Chels

2009-01-10T05:57:00.000-08:00

Hello all,

This is Angie. I got an email from Chelsea this morning. It didn't sound like she had much time to email or blog, so I thought I'd pass it on! Praise God for safe travel!

Chelsea said:

"hey guys!! We just flew into kolkatta...=) we are here safe and sound. last night sleeping was a lil rough with jet lag but the hotel was really nice! ok, so much to tell but we are at an internet cafe before we leave the airport and go to the hotel. barry said just a heads up that you might not hear from us for 3 or 4 days...=( but keep the emails coming! i love the picture! ok, love you guys so much! miss you already! always yours!chelsea"

Ready or not...here I come!!!

2009-01-07T08:08:00.000-08:00

Ok, I leave in 24 hours!

We had a team meeting yesterday...I can already tell that this group is going to bond really quickly! There is one guy on the trip that has never been overseas....we are going to be really good friends..just because everyone else knows what to expect..and yea- we have NO clue!!

Currently I have TWO carry on suitcases full of clothes and I have to swish that down to fit into only ONE suitcase. So, I have a little bit of work to do before tomorrow morning. =)

There is nothing to really report as of now. Thank you guys to much! Your emotional, spiritual and financial support has encouraged me and made this possible!

I will write as soon as possible!

In His Love,
Chelsea

ooohhhh....and I love the rainy nights

2009-01-07T08:04:00.000-08:00

So, over the past couple rainy days that song has been glued to the back of my head.

I was at a meeting for a mission trip to Ngaamba, Kenya this past weekend. One of the girls that had been before was talking about how Ngaamba has not had rain in over 3 years.

Now think about how much you love the rain!!

Sometimes I get so caught up in my world...when I finally think outside of myself I see my blessings for so much more....

I can't really describe it...other than...I love the rainy nights!

2 more days....!!

2009-01-05T17:19:00.001-08:00

Hey Friends!

I can't believe I will be leaving on THURSDAY!! I will be leaving on Thursday and will continue to areas in South Asia! I will be serving on a small team with a few other amazing people. I have to be vague about some details right now due to safety reasons.

God has already brought me on an amazing journey....I am amazed how quickly and flawlessly God has brought this trip together. August of 08 I went on a medical missions trip to El Salvador with Andy Lamb and his team. I can honestly say that that trip was life changing. I came back to the US with even more of a passion for missions and the people of other cultures. I had lunch with Cathy Lamb (Andy's wife) in early October. This lunch was just to talk about the August mission and future plans in my life. I don't even know how it happened...but....somewhere in the conversation I mentioned that I would love to serve for a season in South Asia . ...that started it all.

Next thing I know Cathy contacted one of her close family friends and gave me His contact information. God is truly amazing and mysterious in how He works! I raised all my support money by the end of November and am getting on a plane in less than 72 hours!!

God has been preparing me for this trip...I am not exactly sure what to expect, But I know that something big is in store. I cannot wait to see what all the Lord has been doing over there...=)

My hope is to be able to blog on a regular basis while over seas. (I'm not exactly sure what to expect as far as down time at night and internet service)

Please be praying for my team. There is so much that we hope to accomplish while over there!! Please pray that God would be able to work through us in amazing ways. ....=)

I am so blessed to have all of you as friends and family!! I love you guys and am so encouraged by y'all!

In His Amazing Grace,
Chels

If that ain't love then I don't know what love is...

2008-12-31T10:14:00.000-08:00

I was scanning the radio last night while driving home and I came across Gym Class Hereos song Cupids Chokehold. There is a verse that goes

I mean she even cooks me pancakes
And Alka Seltzer when my tummy aches
If that ain't love then I don't know what love is

Has our culture really reduced love to that? Pancakes and Alka Seltzer = love?

This song just made me think. The love I know is deep and strong and outgoing and never failing....

Why do we not share the kind of love we know with our watered down culture?

Tumbling After Him

2008-12-24T17:55:00.000-08:00

My hope for this blog is not merely a post for stories, music lyrics and quotes. My hope is that through dreams, confusion, struggles, laughter and life experience God will be glorified. I've been meaning to start a blog for some time now. I was able to put that off...until tonight that is.

I was at the Christmas Eve service tonight watching the worship on stage. I was craving something. I knew to extent what I wanted. I just wasn't sure how to get it. The worship team played Glorious One. I get frustrated sometimes when people are in the presences of a magnificent God and hear beautiful songs and sit mildly in their seats as if they are experiencing nothing....the band continued worshiping.

"He became sin who knew no sin so He might become our righteousness"(Jesus Messiah, Chris Tomlin)...these words grabbed me. He, that baby that this season is based around became sin, took on troubles and came to save the world. I have known this in my head for so long. There is something so special, so captivating, so magical when the knowledge in your head is felt by your heart.

I broke down. I was humbled. I can't explain how God was touching my heart in that song. I felt so small, so weak, even worthless compared to His beauty and Majesty. My heart was in that position where I wonder the way i've been living my life. How centered is God in my life? Do I live every day with this same idea of my weakness for His glory? His plan is so great and I want so desperately to be apart of it...but sometimes life gets in the way...and I lose sight of my Saviors love and plan for redemption.

This is all on my heart and floating around my head tonight. I know this is a bad opening blog..."for greater things are yet to come...."

All this to say, I know God is truly blessing you this holiday season. Just be sure to look for Him and center your every moment around Him. Merry Christmas to all...and to all a Good night!!

God is Awesome!
Chelsea

"The other day while I was driving home my world was shaken
It occurred to me that I had left too many risks untaken
I'm always sitting here just waiting for a revelation
Is it ever gonna come?

All this searching yet my destiny is still unfound
Makes me realize this world will always let me down
So it seems that the only hope I ever had
Was everything that You are

I'm falling down
Tumbling after You
I'm overwhelmed
Tripping over simple truth
In all I've found
There's nothing that's more beautiful
Than what I've found in You

You could always see right through the front I'd offer You
Not believing my excuses, waiting for the truth
When You could have turned Your back
And walked away from me
You, You picked me up instead

So we'll turn another page and change the way I look at You
And maybe I'll begin to understand what You went through
Not content to leave me wandering and unaware
You took my hand instead
Yeah, You lead me to the edge

You're everything that I ever needed
Now I wanna believe this time
That You would love me
That You would say I'm Yours, I'm Yours, I'm Yours"

~Starfield, Tumbling After